The World According to Fontinella Bluebell
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Welcome to the Fontabulous world of Fontinella Bluebell, a one stop shop of useless information that will never get you a job, but will make sure everyone wants you on their pub quiz team.
Sunday, 31 March 2013
I Actually Thought That This Was RuPaul
...but it's former 'adult film start' extraordinaire Jenna Jameson. What the what?! Proof that when it comes to surgery, it's best to leave your face alone.
Can we be friends?
The lovely people at Buzzfeed are running an article on 'Messages to Young People Who Don't Believe in Gay Marriage'. Amongst the 37 options on the site, this was my fave. I need to know this girl, she is clearly a genius:
Now that's how you speak to the (more ignorant) youth of today. Though if you are looking for a more blunt approach, this one works too:
Equal rights and love and hugs and kisses for all!
Friday, 29 March 2013
Who's up for a big, camp, Kiki?
I'm a bit tardy to the party with this, but it is my new obsession:
Learning this dance is currently No. 1 on my 5 year plan. Scissor Sisters, I can never thank you enough.
Heidi Montag on Sex Tapes and Jesus
A found this interesting quote while perusing Perez:
I think that that is where the comparisons with JC end. I am certain that Jesus was not persecuted for having a mouldable face. But if ever there was a sign that Heidi's good friend has a sense of humour, it's that his dad put someone on earth who came up with this:"I have been the most religious person since I was 2 years old. I always felt this crazy connection to God. God knows the truth in all of [the Lauren Conrad sex tape rumors], and at the end of the day, that is the only thing that matters. Jesus was persecuted, and I’m going to get persecuted, ya know?"
You are SO welcome.
Too Great to be Straight
I bring you now to a section that shall henceforth be known as 'too great to be straight'. Here you will find a bevvy of delectable men whose only flaw is that they are too good to be true and just not into you. First up, the exceptionally beautiful Matt Bomer:
I know, so cute you could cry. Ugh.
Just look at that face - so chiseled. Those eyes - so mesmerising. That collar-bone - so prominent. Those eyebrows - so well maintained. A coincidence that 'Bomer' sounds like 'boner'? I think not.
Matt is 35 (unbelievable!!), and has 3 sons with his partner Simon Halls.
Beyoncé's Backtracking
I have, for the longest time, been Beyoncé's biggest fan (and for approximately 7 minutes in 2002, her best friend). After very selfishly taking time out from entertaining me to bring up her child (I know, what was the about?) last week she premiered a new song, which is essentially an ode to herself. I include the lyric version below for your listening and reading pleasure. Don't be shy, sing along if you know it:
Yes, it's certainly 'interesting', isn't it? Interesting that the very woman who sang about us being Independent Women has seemingly now taken that back and decided that we are her subjects. I didn't really buy into this debate (mostly because I'm quite certain this is a joke - it only has one verse for crying out loud), until I came across this quote from the woman herself:
“I have always felt strongly about equal opportunity for women. Girls have to be taught from early on that they are strong and capable of being anything they want to be. It's up to us to change the statistics for women around the world. I'm honored to be in the company of women who live fearlessly and set an example for the next generation.”
This appears to be in stark contrast with her newest musical endeavour. While it's a little disappointing that this isn't a 'Run the World' type anthem, it's probably just Beyoncé playing around with narcissism to see if it fits. It suits her well.
And if the ladies of the world are in the mood for a power track, they can always look to Little Mix:
Sunday, 16 October 2011
The Epitome of the Phrase 'So Bad It's Good'
Sarah Michelle Gellar has returned to TV in what can only be described as both horrendous and spectacular fashion. 'Ringer' is a totally unbelievable drama series where Buffy plays two twin sisters. One sister fakes her own death, and the other sister takes over her life to hide from the mob (oh wait, there's more), only to find out that someone is after her sister, who is also a bit of a slut and is avec enfant, but unsure who the baby daddy is.
The show also has an inadvertent comedy aspect, due to the sister's names. In a very Irish fashion the twins are called Bridget and Siobhan. SMG is struggling to pronounce the latter name. She often takes to calling her 'Shiv'. I know many Siobhans, but have never met a Shiv.
Here's a glimpse of the trailer:
I don't think Ringer is on UK or Irish TV yet, so you'll probs just have to wait a bit (nudge nudge, wink wink)
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